Robert Hogan and His Merry Men
by Me
Summary: Schultz spins a midieval Hogan's Heroes tale wherein the Heroes rescue a damsel from an arranged marriage to evil Prince Hochstetter. janybooboo (sorry don't know s/n) & I wrote it 3 yrs. ago


(Author's note: Neither Jany nor I was as good a writer 3-4 years ago when we took turns writing  
parts of this - she was still in grade school, I think - so be gentle. Also, we didn't notice till it was  
too late a minor problem in this story dealing with the time (in more ways than one), but since  
Schultz is telling the story, I think you can forgive us, because it *is* the kind of mistake Schultz  
would make.)  
  
ROBERT HOGAN AND HIS MERRY MEN  
  
"Daddy, I'm scared!" Yelled little Janssen Schultz, as she held on to her father, Hans Schultz.  
Schultz was away, on leave, from Stalag 13. And now, his hometown was being bombed. As his  
family huddled together in the basement, he tried to think of something to calm his frightened  
children.   
  
"Let me tell you a story," said Schultz.  
  
Janssen looked up at Schultz. "What kind of story?"  
  
"Oh, a story with evil princes, beautiful damsels...and most importantly...heroes." Heinrich  
looked up from the floor. The story seemed interesting - so far. Erika smiled.  
  
"Sounds interesting." Wolfgang and Oskar both looked at each other.   
  
"Well, 500 years ago...in 1444...there lived an evil prince...Prince Klink, who ruled over a  
small village. He had five servants. They weren't ordinary servants, though. No, no, no. They had  
their own way of serving people...and this is where our adventure begins..."  
  
  
  
Rune Hoganmuller awoke, early one morning. So early, it was dark. He arose from his bed, and  
yawned. "Time to get up."  
  
Arnold Carterheim's eyes slowly opened. "Let me sleep in...just a little while longer."  
  
"Carterheim...I don't want to see you get thrown in the dungeon. Just get up, and avoid the  
prince's wrath." Carterheim sighed.  
  
"You are right." He got up, and stretched. Peter Newkirkheim awoke, and got out of bed. He  
nudged Louis LeBeau. "Time to get up."  
  
Louis LeBeau turned on his side. "Come on. We're running late. Please get up." LeBeau  
opened his eyes, and sat up. Johan Kinchmeyer yawned, and stepped out of bed as well.   
  
"Morning, Kinchmeyer."  
  
"Good morning, Hoganmuller."  
  
LeBeau made a face. "Must I cook the prince's breakfast, again? Why can't someone else do  
it?"  
  
"Because," said Newkirkheim, "You are the best chef the prince could get. After all, you do  
make very good food. We are lucky to have you in our hut."   
  
"Thank you. I feel so unappreciated, when cooking for that no good prince. He never really  
likes what I cook. Oh, well."   
  
"No one said life as an indentured servant would be easy, Louis," said Kinchmeyer. Everyone  
nodded in agreement. Just then, Sir Hans Schultz walked into the little wooden hut.  
  
"Ah, you are up!" Exclaimed Schultz. "Normally when I walk in here, you are asleep. It is a  
good thing you are up, because LeBeau must start Sir Klink's breakfast - now." Schultz led the  
Frenchman out of the hut. Schultz turned around. "By the way, Hoganmuller...Sir Klink wishes to  
see you at a later hour - something about the way the other servants have been slacking...and he's  
very angry."  
  
Hoganmueller glanced at the obese knight, all decked out in shining armor, and asked "who in  
the world makes your suits, anyway?"  
  
"What business is that of yours?"  
  
"Well," noted Hoganmueller, "I just thought if they can make metal that big, they ought to be  
able to make something better to live in than these shabby huts." He stepped outside into the  
cold, early spring air. "One thing's for sure, it's good to get out here and warm up."  
  
"Ha, you jolly joker." As Schultz watched, LeBeau entered the cooking area and Carterheim  
and Newkirkheim entered the stables. "Kinchmeyer, there is a message his lordship needs you to  
take to Count Burkhalter's castle."  
  
"Sure, I'll get it in just a minute."  
  
Hoganmueller added "as soon as we find out what the message is and I confer with  
Kinchmeyer."  
  
"He wants it to get to the Count as soon as possible," complained the fat man. Suddenly,  
Hoganmueller held up some cinamon. "Oh, cinamon...where do you get spices like that?"  
  
"Really wanna know, Schultz?"  
  
"No, I want to know nothing, just let me have a taste..."  
  
"First, let me confer with my men," emphasized Hogan.  
  
Schultz was stymied. He didn't want to, but even that little bit, nobody could find anything  
like that outside of the Spice Islands. He didn't know what kind of traders these supposedly  
simple-minded indentured servants could know, but he knew one thing - the food in the year 1444  
was very bland. "All right, the message to the Count concerns the availability of the tower." Only  
one of several pieces of cinamon was given to the knight. "Ohhhh, all right, yesterday a man  
came with news that a very important someone needed to be housed there, and the count needed  
to know if this was available." He took another stick. "That is all I know." Hoganmueller  
requested Kinchmyer to send up some smoke signals at a certain location in the woods, and  
Kinchmeyer went into the castle after the drawbridge was lowered.  
  
Later that morning, Hoganmueller entered the castle via the drawbridge. He passed by several  
large rooms until coming to Klink's seamstress and secretary, Helga. "Morning, love," came the  
smiling man as he took her hand. He dared not do more, for in those days a kiss even on the  
forehead was practically a proposal of marriage.  
  
"Hoganmueller, whenever you treat me like that you want something," she noted.  
  
"And I've always promised you great things in return," remarked Hoganmueller.  
  
Helga counted on her fingers. "So far you owe me 15 silk robes from China, rubies from  
Cathay, and a big box of emeralds from Ireland.'  
  
"That last will be here shortly. As for the others...what we need is someone to finance a  
Western route." He noticed Sir Klink stepping out the door, adorned in dark armor with a helmet  
that contained a spear on the top. "Hello, your lordship," spouted Hoganmurller, "I was just  
telling Helga about my ideas for a western route to Asia."  
  
As he hustled Hoganmueller inside, Klink scoffed. "Do not be ridiculous, they would fall off  
the edge within days!" He closed his door. "Hoganmueller, when I took on your debt and  
allowed you to become my servant, you seemed a great leader of men."  
  
"So?"  
  
"So why is it that the servants are slacking off so much; of my 200 servants perhaps a dozen  
are willing to work. How can you explain that? We have had to give up some of the farmland  
this region owns, and give it to peasants."  
  
"Not a bad idea, perhaps there should be more of that," considered Hoganmueller aloud.  
  
"Hoganmueller, are you listening to a word I say? I run the toughest fiefdom in all of  
Northern Europe, there has never been one person sneak in and steal anything!" He pranced  
around his room. "So many other places robbers, bandits, thieves cause problems, wreak havoc  
on gold shipments to and from them, but not here! Can't you at least be proud to be a part of  
that?"  
  
Hoganmueller sighed heavily. "Yeah, maybe."  
  
"I insist that you communicate that to the other servants. This is something to uphold, we  
cannot have people slacking off! When the entire area outside of this castle has bandits taken  
shipments of gold, food, and even the clothes off peoples' backs, my servants need to be extra  
careful. That could happen in here next!"  
"Yeah, all right, I'll tell them, Sir," Hoganmueller agreed. Of course, it was he and his men  
who did a lot of that banditry, robbing from the filthy rich who came there, and giving to the poor  
and needy.  
  
LeBeau walked back into the hut that afternoon. It had been a hard morning preparing the  
breakfast, and the lunch. At least he had time to rest. As he sat on his bed, he gazed at the  
window. The birds seemed to sing happily, as the wind blew softly. He would have to fix the  
others some food soon. "I'm sure I have time for a little nap." Before he knew it, LeBeau was fast  
asleep on his little bed.   
  
He woke up, fifteen minutes later, and realized he slept a little longer than he wanted. Quickly,  
he got up, and ran to look through a bag of ingredients for the meals he cooked. Searching for the  
things he needed, he realized...half was gone. Gone! Food like this was rare for them to have. He  
turned around, and saw a man digging through a chest that was in the corner of their room. The  
chest with all of their most valued possessions.  
  
"GET OUT OF HERE...THIEF!" Screamed LeBeau, as he charghed at the man with a pot.  
The man got out of the chest, and ran out of the door with a bundle of things in his hands.  
LeBeau sighed, and ran back to the chest. "My wool scarf, Kinchmeyer's pen, Hoganmuller's  
watch...Carterheim's paper, and Newkirkheim's hat! Not to mention all that food. Gone! Oh, this  
is terrible!"  
  
Hoganmuller walked into the hut. "What is wrong, LeBeau? You looked troubled."  
  
"Hoganmuller, this is just awful! Someone stole most of our food, my scarf, Kinchmeyer's pen,  
your watch, Carterheim's paper, and Newkirkheim's hat! What do we do? No, food, no scarf, no-"  
LeBeau, who was over reacting more and more by the second, began to cough, loudly. He  
cluched his chest, hacking even louder. Hogan laid a hand on his shoulder.  
  
"Don't get worked up over this. We don't need a scarf, paper, a hat, a pen...and...a...watch...to  
live. We can always find some more food - somehow. Please don't worry so much. You'll make  
yourself sicker."  
  
Kinchmeyer walked down the road, with the message in his hand. He stopped, and turned  
towards the woods. There was a smoke signal coming from in there. He wondered what it meant.  
Slowly, he walked into the darkness ahead. He stopped when he came to a group of people.  
  
"Ah, Kinchmeyer. So, you have seen me." There stood a tall, young man, with blonde hair and  
green eyes. "Nice to see you again. How is Hoganmuller and your other friends?"  
  
"We've been better, Wagner" replied Kinchmeyer. "Some of us are still sick."  
  
"I see...then maybe I should give this message to someone else...I don't want sick men trying  
to deal with this."  
  
"No, no. That is okay. What is it?"  
  
"Well, Prince Hochstetter of Prussia has come. We were hoping Hoganmuller and his men  
could find out why. But like I said...if you aren't up to it..."  
  
"No, we can handle just about anything," said Kinchmeyer. Wagner got on his horse.  
  
"Well, if you need any help - you know how to reach me." He galloped away, and was  
followed by the rest of his men.  
  
Kinchmeyer rode over to the Count's luxurious - by their standards, anyway - castle and  
grimaced. As the drawbridge was lowered to allow him entry, he wondered how some of the  
area's beggars could stand to look at such a structure - let alone the Count himself. He was  
reminded of the Biblical story of the rich man and Lazarus - and became thatnkful that unlike  
many peasants, he and Hoganmueller's other men could read.  
  
Alburt Burkhalter, Count of the Dusseldorf, greeted him in an extravagant purple robe with  
numerous medals given by the King. A member of the King's inncer circle, Count Burkhalter  
likely weighed 350 pounds, at a time when many were scrounging. Their own Sir Schultz could  
eat like that, but he only weighted about 280, and they let him benefit from the extravagant  
lifestyle Klink was allowed to have, a lifestyle greatly aided by the fact nothing had ever been  
stolen from him.  
  
Kinchmeyer bowed and handed Count Burkhalter the message. "Sir Klink sends his  
greetings."  
  
"I told that buffoon to get this here as soon as possible," Burkhatler mumbled as he opened the  
envelope. "I cannot believe how lax his work is. Oh, well, at least he does not squander any of  
the King's holdings like other knights." After reading, he dismissed Kinchmeyer and told him to  
wait outside for a message. Kinchmeyer snuck around to the cooks' area first, grabbing some  
food.   
  
As he went to the appointed meeting place beyond the castle, he heard some murmurring  
among Burkhatler's guards. "Wass ist los," he asked them.  
  
One of the knights considered however much could be told, and finally remarked "there is a  
prisoner in the tower." He would say no more. Kinchmeyer wished he had some of the spices  
Hoganmueller bribed guards with, but he knew that spices were very scarce, even for  
Hoganmueller's Heroes.  
  
Finally, the drawbridge lowered, and one of Count Burkhalter's messenger boys exited with a  
message for Kinchmeyer. "Take it back to Sir Klink right away," the teen insisted.  
  
"Why so urgent," Kinchmeyer wanted to know.  
  
There was no harm in telling this man, deduced the lad. "There will be a carriage coming  
carrying a prisoner for the tower very soon." He bowed and ran back inside, and Kinchmeyer  
galloped away.  
  
After Kinchmeyer delivered the message to Klink, he wandered back to the servants' hut. "A  
prisoner," considered Hoganmueller seriously. He'd heard of people being locked in the dungeon  
before, but the tower was hardly ever used - except for very important people. Not that the  
dungeon was a cruel place with Klink - he was too nice, weak, or both to use some of the torture  
methods others, like Prince Hochstetter, used. However, the dungeon was still darkly lit, with  
only a couple candles int he whole area, and very drafty. One could never see the sunlight in the  
nether reaches of it, whereas at least in the tower light shone in from a solitary window.  
  
The steps winding up to the holding room in the tower were enormous, but even having to  
climb them still beat winding up in the dungeon, where Klink would put servants who didn't listen  
at times.  
  
"Yeah, and Prince Hochstetter is on his way from Prussia," added Kinchmeyer. "I saw some  
smoke signals on the way over." Hoganmueller rubbed his chin, wondering if the two could be  
related. Why would Prince Hochstetter make the days-long journey from those distant lands? He  
could only imagine as he sneezed. He was glad the plague which had swept the area briefly a few  
years ago hadn't returned.  
  
Hoganmuller walked down the halls of the castle. He walked into the throne room, and saw  
Klink sitting on his throne.  
  
"Hoganmuller, I did not summon you."  
  
"I know, sir, but I just came to congratulate you."  
  
"Congratulate me on what?"  
  
"Marrying Count Burkhalter's sister! I heard that this morning from one of the knights."  
  
"WHAT?! That is just a rumor, Hoganmuller. But...what...if...I wonder if it has anything to do  
with that supposedly important person coming."  
  
"What was that?" Inquired Hoganmuller. "Someone is coming? An important person?"  
  
"That is none of your concern, Hoganmuller! Now, leave! Before I throw you into the  
dungeon!"   
  
"Yes, sir." Hoganmuller bowed, and left the castle.  
  
Arnold Carterheim brushed the soft main of one of the horses in the stable. The gentle, brown  
horse stared at Carterheim. When he was done, he laid a hand on the horse's nose. "I'll see you  
later, Heidi."  
  
Newkirkheim laid down some hay for the horses to eat. Just then, Hoganmuller walked in.  
  
"Hello, Arnorld, Peter. Do you know where I might find an ax?"  
  
Carterheim looked through a box of tools, and pulled out an ax. "Here." He handed the ax to  
Hoganmuller.  
  
"Thank you." And with that, Hoganmuller left the stable, and headed for the nearby woods. As  
he began to chop at a tree, he wondered about the improtant prisoner being brought to the tower.  
Soon, the tree came tumbling to the ground. As he began to split it into peices, his arms felt tired.  
"I'll take one quick break."   
  
He sat on a tree stump, and pulled something out of his pocket. An ocarina, made out of  
terra-cotta. He put the ovoid shaped wind instrument to his mouth, and began to play it. The soft,  
gentle tones of the ocarina soothed the tired servant. He was startled to hear his named being  
called.  
  
"Rune! Rune! Where are you?"   
  
Hogan put down the flute-like instrument and turned to see Kinchmeyer. He indicated a series  
of smoke signals coming from the south. Hoganmueller went back to the stable, where he noticed  
Carterheim preparing to go into the woods to practice his archery. Grabbing a dapple gray  
stallion, Hoganmueller saddled up as Schultz came out to see them.  
  
"Oh, hi, Sir Schultz, what's up," inquired Hoganmueller atop the mare.  
  
"Hoganmueller...what are you doing on Wizard?"  
  
"Oh, he'd been a little sick, I was gonna air him out a bit." The horse whinneyed. "He's a  
beaut, isn't he?"  
  
"Yes, which is why I cannot let you ride him unless I know where you are going," insisted the  
knight, shaking a gloved finger.  
  
"Well you see, Schultz, there's this smoke signal coming from the south, and I am going to  
investigate," explained Hoganmueller.  
  
"You want...to do what," came the suddenly concerned man.  
  
"Because it might have to do with an evil prince coming this way, and..."  
  
Schultz's armor clanked as he backed up. "Wait a minute, do not tell me any more..."  
  
"You don't want to know about the prisoner in the tower who we..."  
  
"No, Hoganmueller, I want to hear nothing, nothing!" He ran away as fast as he could, given  
his armor, and Hoganmueller rode off. Wizard trotted gleefully int he open air, galloping  
majestically through the forest as its rider sat tall in the saddle, trying to look out for signs of  
where the smoke might be originating.  
  
Finally, he spotted a small fire. If Kinchmeyer was right, he told himself as he disembarked  
and tied the horse to a tree, the special visitor should be being taken to the tower right now. He  
walked up to a lovely looking maiden who was folding a blanket, which she'd been flapping over  
the fire. "Rune Hoganmueller, how good to see you. Is everything well?" The voice held a tinge  
of concern.  
  
"Just fine. Almost had to bring that fat knight with me, Sir Schultz." He laughed as he  
recalled the time Schultz had spotted the maiden in the servant's quarters. Women were not  
expected to be with a man - let alone a group of men - like that. The scandal could have ruined  
the woman at her young age - this was why she was meeting with him here, in the woods. "How  
are you?"  
  
The maiden sighed heavily. "As you know, my father is a duke, so I spent some time in the  
nursery with the Princess when the King would visit. Well, we have stayed good friends, though  
while I have been courted by Fritz, a prominent member of the grocer's guild, I knew nothing of  
the king's plans for Her Highness."  
  
Fritz's family is quite respected - sounds like their families should be able to make the match,  
considered Hoganmueller. "Yes, go on."  
  
"I have heard lately that the king wants to marry his daughter to one of the most vile princes I  
know, his name is Hochstetter."  
  
Hoganmueller fumed. Seventeen was not all that young for marriages to be arranged, but still,  
it seemed a mighty young age to him. The damsel in front of him was eighteen and her courtship  
was only in the middle stages - that marraige might not be arranged till she was twenty!   
"Obviously a marriage of convenience," he ascertained.  
  
"Yes," remarked the maiden, "the Prince controls quite a bit of territory, and stands to inherit  
more, in the regions of Brandenburg, Westphalia, and so on. Combined with the king's holdings,  
a fair sized kingdom could be started up. That is no reason to marry." She thought fondly of  
Fritz's love for her. At least Fritz is a gentleman, even if our familes are setting it up to connect  
some influence. I might have fallen in love with him, anyway.  
  
Hoganmueller was thinking the same thing. "Not only that, but Hochstetter is a ruthless man.   
He's twice the princess's age, and he seems to get his jollies out of torturing subjects. I'd hate to  
see what's in his dungeon." Or what he might do to her or what their kids would turn out like.   
Nobody stayed unmarried past their middle twenties unless they were brutally savage, like  
Hochstetter, or unless they were complete fools or imopssible to live with, like the incredibly vain  
Sir Klink or the nagging Gertrude Burkhalter. Or a womanizer like me, Hoganmueller muused,  
although I would like to get married soon.  
  
"We both agree, then, a marriage like this would be very wrong. I believe she is going to be  
held in a tower until the day of the wedding. It might be yours," the damsel noted.  
  
Hoganmueller nodded and mounted his steed once more. "Okay, thanks for the tip. I'll get to  
work on it right away."  
  
"I may even be asked to be part of the bride's party by the king. Do get her out of this,  
Hoganmueller, I do not want to have to go through seeing that lovely damsel being given to that  
monster Hochstetter." He promised he would, and rode off.  
  
Hoganmuller arrived at the stable, and tied Wizard back up again. He slowly walked back to  
the hut. "Ah, Hoganmuller. Would you like some soup?" Hoganmuller nodded, and LeBeau gave  
him a bowl of soup.  
  
"Kinchmeyer told me of the fire signal...what was that about, if you don't mind my asking."  
Hoganmuller laughed.  
  
"I don't mind you asking, LeBeau!" He tasted the soup, and nodded, saying, "Good soup."  
  
"Merci."  
  
"Well, anyway...about that smoke signal...there's a princess being brought to the tower. She is  
going to be kept in there until she is to marry Prince Hochstetter of Prussia - against her will."  
LeBeau's mouth dropped open.  
  
"How cruel!"  
  
"Listen up, they're goiing to bring her in...in about 30 minutes. We'll have to find a way to  
distract Schultz, and get someone into that tower!"  
  
Hans Schultz stood next to the tower. "Halt!" He exclaimed, as he saw Hoganmuller walk up  
to him.  
  
"Relax, Schultz. I just heard a great riddle, and I wanted you to hear it."  
  
"A...riddle...that is it?"  
  
"Yes. May I tell it to you?"  
  
"I don't see why not."  
  
"How many boards would the Mongols hoard, if the Mongol hordes got bored?" Schultz  
thought a long time. He stood there, very silent, thinking as hard as he could. Meanwhile,  
Newkirkheim slipped passed Schultz, and entered the tower door. It was dark, and cold. It  
reminded him of the dungeon. As he walked up the winding stairs, he began to shiver.   
  
He came to the wooden door, and knocked on it.  
  
"Who...who is there?"  
  
"I've come to help you." Newkirkheim opened the door, and found a beautiful young woman,  
with long, sandy blonde hair, and dark, brown eyes. Her long, blue dress was unlike anything the  
servant had ever seen before. The princess was laying on her bed, and it was obvious she had been  
crying, for there was a tear, still hanging from her chin. "Don't cry. I and others are going to help  
you. I'm Peter Newkirkheim." The princess sat up, and looked at Newkirkheim.  
  
"And I am Princess Ada."  
  
"My friends and I will get you away from Prince Hochstetter - we promise."  
  
Ada shuddered. "From what I've heard about him, he seems terrible."  
  
"That's why we aren't going to let him have you. I'll be right back and tell Rune, and we'll  
make a plan to get you out of this tower."  
  
"Rune?"  
  
"Yes. Rune Hoganmuller. One of my friends. Also, Arnold Carterheim, Louis LeBeau, and  
Johan Kinchmeyer." Ada nodded, and Newkirkheim ran down the stairs. Schultz turned around,  
and saw Newkirkheim running out of the door.  
  
"What are you doing here?"  
  
"Um...just guarding the door from the other side, Schultz."  
  
"Oh, well...thank you. Hoganmuller, you and Newkirkheim get back to your hut - now."  
  
Hoganmueller and Newkirkheim left the castle via the drawbridge, and stopped to gaze at  
some of the creatures in the moat. "Ol' Klink sure doesn't pay too much attention to his 'moat  
monsters,' does he," spoke Hoganmueller.  
  
An "eep, eep" was heard as Newkirkheim held out an old, stale fish. He tossed it into the air,  
and a dolphin leaped up and grabbed it before twisted and landing in the moat on his back. "We  
got some people who know how to fill a moat with the right stuff."  
  
Hoganmueller grinned, then turned to Newkirkheim. "Clever, but don't let Count Burkhalter  
see it, he'll think Klink's flipped."  
  
"I thought he already had," commented Newkirkheim as he threw another smelly fish into the  
air.  
  
Hogan pulled him over toward the hut and said "come on, the knights are starting to look this  
way." Newkirkheim grudgingly walked away. "Where'd you find that thing?"  
  
"I'm afraid that's top secret," spoke the man as they walked into the hut. Kinchmeyer,  
Carterheim, and LeBeau gathered around. "Now, the princess knows we're gonna help. My  
question is, how?"  
  
Hoganmueller pulled over a stone table and placed a foot upon it, resting his elbow on his  
knee. "I'm not sure, but Prince Hochstetter wants to marry someone. The princess should marry  
someone so he can't, but..." He paused a moment.  
  
Kinchmeyer raised an eyebrow. "You're not thinking of doing it, are you," inquired the man.  
  
"And leave this happy hole in the ground? Don't be crazy. I can meet far more damsels and  
maidens doing this," he spoke as he stood. "No, there will be a priest here to perform the  
ceremony, we just have to find someone of rather noble rank to pair her with. As for  
Hochstetter...Kinchmeyer, take a message." He pulled out a quill pen and a container of ink.   
Dabbing the pen in it, he began to write on a blank sheet of paper. Hoganmueller was glad  
Kinchmeyer never had to scribble anything out - his messages were usually very neat. "Write this  
- 'Dear Gertrude, I have been longing to see you. When Prince Hochstetter comes this way, I  
want you to come to my castle. I have something very important to tell you. Sincerely, Sir  
Wilhelm Klink of Hammelburg.'"  
  
"Do we know for sure she can read," Kinchmeyer wanted to know.  
  
"Yeah, what if Burkhalter comes, too," inquired Carterheim.  
  
"If the count comes," noted Hoganmueller, "that will give us just one more person who would  
like to get rid of Hochstetter after what we're going to do." The other indentured servants grew  
puzzled at Hoganmueller's smirk, but knew he was up to something. He always was.  
  
Kinchmeyer got plenty of sleep, because after dark, which that time of year was still rather  
early, he put on some armor, then snuck out to the stables. He would approach Burkhalter's  
castle then so as to not to let anyone know who he really was, and hand the message to the night  
watchman.  
  
The trek out of the stables proved uneventful, and he was able to get a horse rather easily. He  
galloped into the dark, lonely night, pondering the massive number of stars. With no candles to  
dim the view, the sparkling beauty was breathtaking. Thre were probably tens of thousands out  
there. He wondered whether it was true, as he rode, that the Earth was the center of the universe.   
Could all of those revolve around his planet? Things should revolve around God, not around this  
little ball which was so imperfect. But, how, then, was the Universe organized? Were the six  
planets going around the sun? What of the stars, then?  
  
He enjoyed pondering such as this during his quiet treks to and from different places for  
Hoganmueller's Heroes. Always a quiet man, these moments allowed him to be at his most  
pensive. Quickly coming upon the castle, he alterted his voice and announced himself as "a secret  
courier, with a message for the Count's sister, Gertrude." He handed the note to the night  
watchman, neither man able to see each others' face well in the dimly lit night, and prepared his  
horse to scamper back. The steed made good time, and he was back in the hut by 2 in the  
morning.  
  
Hoganmueller laid awake and pondered the mundane existence of an indentured servant. He  
was glad to be able to help at least this little bit, though he wished he could do more. He  
pondered the vast distances - Berlin and its twin settlement, Kolin, where Hochstetter was from,  
were about five days' journey for Hochstetter. They didn't have much time. What might the  
princess be thinking right now? He could only imagine.  
  
Louis LeBeau rode down the road, on Wizard, with several coins jingling in his pocket. He was  
going to the most lively place he knew - the market. Fortunatly, Schultz didn't follow him. He  
knew what would happen, then. He would sneak most of the food he was buying fot the wedding,  
and eat it. Before he decided to buy something from the market though, he remembered he had to  
make a special stop. He turned left, and went down a little road in the woods.  
  
There was a small cottage, with large trees surrounding it. He got off Wizard, and walked to  
the door with a basket in his hand. The door slowly opened, after LeBeau knocked on it. A little  
girl, about six or seven opened up the door.  
  
"Hello, Hilda."  
  
"Oh! Mister LeBeau. How do you do?"  
  
"Fine, Hilda, fine. May I come in? I brought many good things to eat." Hilda smiled, broadly,  
and allowed LeBeau inside. Slowly, he walked in, and noticed all the children, ranging from two  
to 12, doing their daily chores. One was sweeping, one was cooking, and some, he was sure, were  
out behind the cottage, chopping wood, and gathering eggs. "Hello, Erika, Oskar, Wollfgang."  
Several children ran to greet the servant. A woman got up from the floor, and stood to greet  
LeBeau. "Ah, Lily. Nice to see you again." LeBeau handed the basket to the tall, red headed  
woman. "Here is some food for you and the children."  
  
"Ah, thank you, Louis. You don't know how much this means to me, and the children. Give  
my thanks to Rune. You are all so generous to give this food to the orphans. Thank you."  
  
"You are quite welcome, Lily. I better be leaving, before someone finds out I am here. Plus, I  
must go to the market, and buy some things for Prince Klink." Lily nodded, as LeBeau headed for  
the door.  
  
"Thanks, again!" All the children followed LeBeau to the door, begging him to stay just a little  
while longer. He apologized, and told them he would come back another day. Galloping away on  
Wizard, he turned and waved good bye to the orphans and Lily, and they waved back.   
  
Soon, he was on the road to the market once again. When he arrived, he got off Wizard, and  
left him near a tree. Soon, he was looking through the meats and vegetables that the market had  
to offer. He liked the hustle and the bustle, and he planned to enjoy every last minute of it. Just  
then, someone, a young boy, ran into him, causing him to fall onto the ground. His coins flew out  
of his pocket and scattered about.  
  
"Oh, no!"   
  
LeBeau grumbled, a little miffed, as he searched for the coins. He found several, and turned to  
ask the young boy for help, but he was gone already. Where did he disappear to, he asked  
himself. I hope I can find him again - if he did get some of the money, he did as good a job as our  
band of merry men does.  
  
The Lorrainite - originally from the Duchy of Lorraine, wedged between French and German  
peoples' lands - considered the young man handling the vegetables. His name was Fritz, and  
Hoganmueller had remarked that he was actively courting a lady who'd given information on the  
Princess they were trying to rescue. Would he know anything about that? It didn't hurt to ask.  
  
"Hello, Fritz," LeBeau began as Fritz piled some new potatoes into a group on one cart, "how  
is your courtship going?"  
  
"Fine, fine, how are things at Klink's castle?"  
  
"It has been better. We have heard rumors of a big wedding - I am buying some items for a  
feast."  
  
Fritz nodded. "I heard about that - the lady whom I am courting is supposed to be part of a  
bridal party in a couple of days - one of the maids of honor." He finished grouping the foods. "I  
hope things go well."  
  
"Where will the wedding be," LeBeau wanted to know.  
  
"Count Burkhalter is among the King's inner circle - I do not know for sure, being in the  
guilds, I am not privvy to such information as those in royalty are. However, the count's castle  
would be my guess." LeBeau thanked him and left. He reported the information to  
Hoganmueller after arriving back in the servants' hut.  
  
"Hmmm, okay, Louis, Gertrude's going to be coming to see Klink, hopefully early tomorrow.   
We don't know when Prince Hochstetter will show up, but my guess is it's going to be about then,  
and we'll have a big feast there." He rubbed hsi chin. "Carterheim, Newkirkheim, my thought is  
the wedding will be the day after tomorrow. Hochstetter will go over to Burkhalter's first so he's  
not in the same place as the bride before the wedding. When they take the princess over you'll  
hijack the carriage."  
  
Kinchmeyer raised a hand. "Perchance Hochstetter wonders what's taking the damsel so long,  
what then?"  
  
"That," he said, holding up a finger, "is simple - we just have to get someone else to march  
down that aisle."  
  
Wilhelm Klink awoke early in the morning, and yawned. He got dressed, and headed for his  
table, down the hall. As he sat down, his food was all ready in front of him. He was about to take  
a bite, until he was startled to hear Schultz behind him.  
  
"Someone is here to see you, your highness."  
  
"Who?"  
  
"The sister of Count Burkhalter - Gerturde."  
  
Klink turned around, to face Schultz. A look of horror was across his face. "WHAT?! Where  
is she?"  
  
"In the throne room."  
  
"Why did you let her in?!"  
  
Schultz pulled a letter out of his pocket. "Well, she had this letter from you, so I thought you  
were expecting her."  
  
"Letter? What letter?" Klink grabbed the letter and read it. He turned a light shade of red.  
"Who...who...could...do this...to me?" Hoganmuller came to mind, but this wasn't his hand  
writing. It wasn't Schultz's either. Klink had no idea that Hoganmuller's men could read and write,  
so it never came to him that it was Kinchmeyer.  
  
Klink sighed and put the letter in his pocket. "Well, I better go greet her. There is nothing I  
can do now. When she leaves, though, someone is giong to be thrown in the dungeon!"  
  
He got up from his chair, and walked into the throne room. "Ah, Wilhelm...what is it you wish  
to see me about?" Klink sighed, and thought for a moment. "You wanted to see me about  
something. I received your letter last night."   
  
"Ja, I know." He looked at the floor. "I have something to tell you."  
  
"Well then, Wilhelm, what is it?"  
  
"Gertrude, this is very hard for me to say."  
  
"Just go ahead."  
  
"Well...I...I..."  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"I...I heard you have been...um...cursed."  
  
"Cursed?!"  
  
"Yes, by an evil witch, who is jealous of your family, and you won't ever get married!"  
  
"Isn't there a way to...to...get rid of the curse?"  
  
Klink stammered a bit, not sure of what to say, while Gertrude thoguht for a minute and  
smiled.  
  
She figured he was playing hard to get. "Can we talk about this another time Klink? I'll stay in  
one of your guest rooms, and we can talk about what you really wanted to tell me!"  
  
"Schultz?" Schultz stepped into the room. Klink pulled him a little ways away from Gertrude,  
and whispered, "Take Gertrude into one of my guest rooms - and then get Hogamuller!" Schultz  
showed Gertrude to the castle's guest quarters, then instructed the person in charge to lower the  
drawbridge. He marched out to the guest quarters.  
  
Good, Hoganmueller considered, peering out the door, this should be right on schedule. And  
Hochstetter hasn't shown up yet, either.  
  
The knight rapped on the door, and Hoganmueller answered.  
  
"His Highness wishes to see you in the throne room," Schultz said, laying his spear down.  
  
"What's this about, Schultz?" He has to at least pretend he didn't know.  
  
When the knight refused to say anything, he handed him a small stick of cinamon. "I only  
know that Gertrude said somebody sent her a letter, and he probably wishes to discuss it with  
you. That is all I know."  
  
Hoganmueller and Schultz walked to the throne room. Schultz was dismissed, and Klink rose  
from the high throne to confide in Hoganmueller. "You have got to help me - I am afraid Count  
Burkhalter's sister wants me to..." He gulped. "Marry her."  
  
"Marriage will be good for you," Hoganmueller considered aloud.  
  
"Hoganmueller, that is a terrible thing to say, especially to your master! Now really,  
Hoganmueller, you and I can understand each other on this." He paused a moment. "After all,  
you've never gotten married."  
  
Hoganmueller shrugged. "Come on, who'd want to marry a servant like me? Look at the  
money you'd be getting into if you married Gertrude."  
  
"Money does not matter when you cannot stand to look at someone." He shuddered. "Or  
listen to them."  
  
"Well, where is she now? Maybe I can talk to her."  
  
Sir Klink harumphed. "Knowing her, probably making the wedding arrangements. She went  
to my guest quarters after I gave her some story about her being cursed never to get married."  
  
Hoganmueller was pleased - this would work out better than he had hoped. "How did you  
know she was cursed?"  
  
"I don't, I made that up because she got a letter telling her I had something important to say."   
He picked it up from the table and brought it over to the servant, knowing it would be futile.   
"You did not write this, did you?"  
  
"Me, I'd never send a letter to her," declared Hoganmueller. He scanned it. "Although, if you  
told her she was cursed, maybe there's a way to break the curse."  
  
"Yes, yes," Klink spoke exictedly.  
  
"Give me some time, I have to think." At that moment, Prince Hochstetter entered in a huff.   
"Oh, hello, your highness," came the servant as he bowed along with Klink.  
  
"Klink, we have some important matters to discuss...what is this servant doing here?"  
  
"Oh, Prince Hochstetter, Rune Hognmueller, he was just leaving." He whispered "out,  
Hoganmueller."  
  
"I can stay, I think I might just have the answer to your problems, Your Highness..."  
  
"A servant solving problems for a knight," complained the prince loudly.  
  
"Later, Hoganmueller..." insisted Klink.  
  
"Really," the servant said to Prince Hochstetter, "it's very important to Sir Klink, it'll only take  
a minute."  
  
"WHAT IS THIS SERVANT DOING HERE?!?!"  
  
"Okay, okay," said Hoganmuller, "I'm leaving!"  
  
The servant ran out of the throne room, and back to the servants quarters. He began to dig  
through a small sack, and frowned.  
  
"What is it, Rune?" Inquired LeBeau.  
  
"We're out."  
  
"Out of what?" The question came from Carterheim.  
  
"Cinnamon!" Everyone gasped. "I was hoping I could bribe the guard with the cinnamon, to  
let me into Gertrude's quarters, but I'm afraid we're out."  
  
"That's not very surprising with Schultz around," said Kinchmeyer.  
  
"What do we do, then?" asked Newkirkheim.  
  
"Louis?"  
  
"Yes, Rune?"  
  
"Doesn't Klink still have a little cinnamon?"  
  
LeBeau shrugged. "Maybe...even if he did, it probably wouldn't be much."  
  
"We'll just have to make do. Could you get some?"  
  
"I don't know. Cinnamon just doesn't grow on trees, so they might not have much. Also, what  
if I am caught?"  
  
"You'll think of something."  
  
"Absolutly, positively, no! They could have my head if I am caught stealing from the kitchen!"  
  
"Please? What will become of Ada, if we don't do this right?" LeBeau looked at Hoganmuller.  
  
As Louis LeBeau walked into the kitchen, he wondered how Hoganmuller got him to do these  
things. He looked through the kitchen, turning everything upsidedown, giong through everything  
he could find, until, finally, he found two sticks of cinnamon! He picked it up, and smiled.  
Hoganmuller would be pleased. He was about to leave, until Shutlz startled him. "What are you  
doing with the Prince's last bit of cinnamon?"  
  
The servant stammered and stuttered. "Oh...well...Schultzie, don't you think your children  
would love some?"  
  
The knight sighed. "LeBeau, you know full well I am a peasant, just like you. Some of these  
knights are professionals, mercenaries in some cases who have fought in wars! But me?" He  
pursed his lips and lowered his voice. "All I want to do is save up some money and when I get  
too old to be a useful knight, I want to open up a little toy store. So little Janssen, and Heinrich,  
and Erika, and Wolfgang, and Oskar will be able to keep it in the family, and they and their  
children will never have to beg like so many of their friends do."  
  
LeBeau nodded. Yes, he could understand the reasoning. And he could see why the knight  
insisted on not letting him have the expensive spices so he could not get in trouble. Still, he had  
to think of something. "Well...look, do you think perhaps you could at least let me have a little?"   
He shook his head. "Just a little bit? Please?"  
  
Schultz grumbled a moment, then said "I hear the same thing from my children when I leave  
and they see how stuffed I get from Sir Klink's meals. But I always tell them, you need to wait.   
It will pay off later; it is hard now, but it will be worth it to wait."  
  
  
  
Heinrich looked up sleepily from Schultz's lap; the bombs had slowed considerably back in the  
present, though part of that was the interesting story kept them from thiking about the bombing.   
"Did he ever open his toy shop?"  
  
The fat guard smiled down upon the lad, knowing it would make a good comparison to the  
present, with him away at war. "He will be home to open it someday, maybe a year or two, but  
just like me, he will do it." The lad seemed satisfied. Schultz continued by remarking "LeBeau  
decided to offer a trade - he would take no cinamon if Hoganmueller could get in to see Gertrude.   
This was accepted..." And soon, their minds were back in those magical times once more.  
  
  
  
Schultz lowered the drawbridge, and the knight allowed Hoganmueller to enter. Sir Klink  
won't be anywhere near as upset about this as he was about Gertrude, he mused. If he asks, I will  
say Hoganmueller is trying to get rid of her for him.  
  
Hoganmueller removed the cap he wore, and got on one knee. Only his great poise kept him  
from snickering as he took her hand and said to Gertrude "a thousand warm greetings to one of  
the fairest maidens in the land."  
  
The homely, obese woman was taken aback, but pleased, at this servant's attitude. Could  
he...no, she told herself, the Count would never approve my marrying a servant. Which was just  
why Hoganmueller was willing to act as though courting her. "What is it, Servant?"  
  
Hogan stood, and answered "my name is Rune Hoganmueller. I am sorry to hear, His  
Highness Sir Wilhelm Klink of Hammelburg is much more shy than he ever let on."  
  
"Ah, so...that birdbrain. He told me I had a curse! Why does he not tell me his true feelings?  
  
"I am not sure he totally understands...it may well be that he has one in mind other than himself  
to marry you."  
  
"Who," snapped the lady.  
  
She is like a witch, pondered Hoganmueller. "Let me start at the top - we servants hear many  
things. I fear it is sadly true that you are cursed, as well." He bowed slightly and explained. "I  
have a way to break the spell, however."  
  
"Oh? How?"  
  
Hoganmueller explained "the spirits of this world take great stock in outward appearances.   
Say, for instance, you were to go to your brother's castle as if you were getting married - wedding  
dress, everything." He explained "one of Sir Klink's servants, LeBeau, is a tailor. He could make  
you a wedding dress, you could ride in a carriage to get married..."  
  
"Why not just get married while I am at it?"  
  
"The spirits will follow you, ruin the wedding. But once they have done so, the curse will be  
broken. The down side is, you may never be able to marry the one you tried to marry."  
  
She sized him up. How did a mere servant know so much? Then again, she knew servants  
were an odd sort, not like the nobility. It was quite possible that this man did strange things on  
the side - perhaps even spoke with witches. He certainly seemed sincere. "Tell you what, I will  
do it on one condition."  
  
Hotganmueller hoped this wouldn't be too odd. "What might that be?"  
  
"I may be a Count's sister, but I know what the penalty can be for conspiring with witches or  
to do witchcraft. And I warn you, servant, if there is some trickery, I will make sure you pay for  
it."  
  
Hoganmueller knew he could pin yet something else on that most evil of princes. "You have  
my word on it - the 'groom' for your wedding has ensured you will not be troubled afterward.   
You may even be able to marry him, he may just be keeping his plans to marry you hidden to  
avoid any evil spells himself." He suggested Sir Klink not be told about the specific plans to break  
the curse, then departed, hoping she assumed that the "groom" would be Sir Klink. In fact, it  
would be Prince Hochstetter.  
  
That night, LeBeau sat on his bed, thinking about what he would prepare for the feast. This  
feast, he was sure, would be delicious. He smiled as he heard Hoganmuller play his ocarina.  
Carterheim, who was leaning against the wall, began to slightly sway to the soothing music.  
Hoganmuller then stopped playing and thought for a moment. "I'm going to the tower, to let the  
Princess know we have a plan to get her away from Hochstetter."  
  
"That's a good idea," said Kinchmeyer. Hoganmuller put his ocarina in his pocket, and left the  
hut. He walked to the tower, and noticed Schultz sleeping. He snuck past the guard, and up the  
winding stairs. After he knocked, Ada gave him permission to enter.   
  
"Come in." Hoganmuller walked inside of the room, and found the Princess, sitting on a chair.  
"Ah, another servant. One of Rune Hoganmuller's men? I've heard about him."  
  
"I'm Rune Hoganmuller." Ada looked up with surprise at Hoganmuller, and stood up.  
  
"Well...I am Ada." She smiled at Hoganmuller.   
  
"I have a plan," said Hoganmuller. "I am sure it will get you away from Prince Hochstetter."  
  
"Oh, thank goodness!" She cried, with tears in her eyes. "I am saved then? I will not have to  
marry Prince Hochstetetter?" Hoganmuller nodded. The Princess smiled, and took Hoganmuller's  
hand. "So I may marry whom I choose. Thank you."  
  
"Well," said Hogan, as he took his hand away from Ada, "save your thank you until it works.  
This will be tricky, but I am sure, if we try very hard, it will work." Ada nodded. "I better get  
back to my hut, before the guards miss me. Plus, we've got to make further planning about this  
stunt we're going to pull. Good night." And with that, Hoganmuller left the tower, and ran back to  
his hut. Ada sat at the window and sighed, with a slight smile on her face.  
  
LeBeau awakened at 2 in the morning, and was almost done sewing the bridal dress for  
Princess Ada when Sir Schultz arrived. "Ah, you are up bright and early," proclaimed the fat  
knight as he wandered into the hut. "Good, because His Highness wants this to be a very fancy  
feast. It is to be ready at noon."  
  
"Noon," complained LeBeau, "why I won't have time to make..." He stopped himself before  
saying "Gertrude's dress." "That is, I just did this dress really fast, it may need some alterations.   
Prince Hochstetter left strict orders that we weren't to go up and see the princess."  
  
"The measurements were provided to you by the King himself," insisted Schultz. "And it is his  
daughter, so he should know." LeBeau grumbled, fuming.  
  
"All right," came Hoganmueller, trying to calm him as he went to the backup plan of telling  
Schultz, "I guess you didn't hear, there's been a change in plans."  
  
"There has? Why wasn't I informed?"  
  
"You were probably sleeping when Sir Klink tried to tell ya," commented Newkirkheim.  
  
Sir Schultz pursed his lips. "Well, he should make sure I wake up. Okay, what is it."  
  
Hoganmueller explained that "LeBeau needs to sew a dress for His Highness Count  
Burkhalter's sister."  
  
"She is getting married too," spoke the confused man, picking up his spear. "I will have to tell  
Sir Klink, he was very worried that she might try to marry him." He began to leave, then turned  
back and whispered to Hoganmueller "uh...she is going to marry someone else, isn't she?"  
  
As Hoganmueller opened his mouth, the knight began to wish he hadn't asked. "Sure. You  
see, instead of the prince marrying..."  
  
Schultz instantly held up his hands. "Wait a minute, do not tell me! I want to know nothing,  
no-thing!" He quickly fled. "Wait a minute," he cried as he re-entered the hut, "I want to know  
nothing, but you are to come with me, LeBeau, and prepare the feast."  
  
The two left as Hoganmueller mapped out the strategy for the others. The wedding would  
occur after the feast. They would likely leave about 2:30, which meant that Kinchmyer,  
Newkirkheim and Carterheim needed to be stationed along the narrow road at about 2:40, ready  
to pounce. Once the driver and other knights were subdued, Kinchmyer would take the princess  
to a hiding place, while Carterheim and Newkirkheim joined Hoganmueller and LeBeau at  
Burkhalter's castle, where they were to all serve as ushers for the ceremony.  
  
LeBeau spent the entire morning slaving over a large pot whlie preparing several styles of meat  
- venison, beef, pork, and a couple others - potatoes, vegetables, and several other items. He  
pondered the wastefulness of Klink's castle..  
  
Okay, he told himself as he noticed Schultz gobbling some of the items as a "taste test," so  
with him around nothing really goes to waste. But, still, Sir Klink seemed to care nothing about  
the many starving peasants.  
  
He grew excited when he thought of the daring raid they planned on Burkhalter's kitchen at  
the same time as the "wedding." It will serve that bloated count right, he told himself.  
  
But, first, LeBeau would go to Burkhalter's castle and get some food in a normal way.  
  
"He wants WHAT?!"  
  
LeBeau stepped back, and looked at the Count. "Prince Klink asks if he may borrow some  
food from your palace."  
  
"No," said Burkhalter, angrily.   
  
"Did I fail to mention the food is going to be used in celebration of Princess Ada's and Prince  
Hochstetter's marriage?"  
  
Burkhalter gulped. "Yes, servant...you...did." He immediately got a guard to show LeBeau to  
the kitchen. The guard left as soon as they were at the kitchen. LeBeau made sure that no one  
was around, as he began to dig through the kitchen for things he could steal.  
  
"Oh! My goodness!" LeBeau found several sticks of cinnamon. He counted a total of fifteen.  
Fifteen sticks of cinnamon! He had never seen so much cinnamon at once. This was more then he  
had ever found in Klink's kitchen. He stuffed it in his bag. He had found a lot of food, some of  
which would be used for the feast, but most of it would be given to the poor. A smile spread  
across his face when he remembered that they would get more during the wedding. The servant  
chuckled. "Serves Burkhalter right."   
  
Princess Ada paced back and forth, wondering if Hoganmuller and his friends could pull this  
off. Her entire future depended on this. What if it was too much? What if they couldn't do it?  
What if Hochstetter found out? She gulped. That would be the end of all of them. The Princess  
could only imagine what the evil Prince would do to them all. He would probably enjoy every  
minute of it. She shuddered. "You must have more faith than that, in Rune, Ada!" Sighing, she  
muttered, "The feast must be going on right now."  
  
LeBeau, who had hid most of the food which he had gotten from the Count's palace in the hut,  
stood in the kitchen, waiting for everyone to be seated. Hoganmuller walked in, and said, "You  
can serve the first course, now."   
  
"Right." Hoganmuller and the others picked up plates of food, and headed for the table.  
Carterheim's eyes grew wide as he saw someone of great importance sitting at the table. It wasn't  
Hochstetter, Klink or Burkhalter. Someone even greater. Carter began to trip on Newkirkheim,  
when he saw King Fredrick.  
  
Carterheim's and Newkirkheim's feet became intertwined, and soon the two waiters were  
stumbling, bumbling, and dropping food all over.  
  
"Dumbkopfs," cried Klink as he pushed back his chair and began to wipe off Prince   
Hochstetter's fancy black robe, which had become soiled by some of the food. "I am so sorry,  
your excellency," he murmurred as the servants quickly gathered up the food. "One just cannot  
find good help these days."  
  
Hochstetter scowled. "Bah, the French have been at war off and on with England for over a  
hundred years and they have got to manage better than you."  
  
Hoganmueller chided the prince. "Well, of course, everyone knows the French are the only  
people who are any good with food. You'd never be able to cook if you had to, Sir."  
  
"Yah, thankfully I do not," compalined the prince as he grabbed some of the newly placed  
vegetables off his plate and began to consume them.  
  
Trying to impress the king, Sir Klink nodded. "Oh, yes, your Royal Highness, and we have the  
most superb chef anywhere, I am sure. You know, I have always been fond of French cooking.   
Not that we get around a whole lot, but there are advantages to being a knight, and one of them is  
servants from just about anywhere; and I have always said, the French..."  
  
"Klink," shouted the Count. "You are babbling like an overflowing brook."  
  
Klink bowed slightly as the king looked on, only slightly amused. "Well, I just want his  
Highness to know that we spare no expense here, in fact..."  
  
The king tried to ignore the loudmouth Sir Klink as he considered the servants who were  
constantly serving portions and taking them away. He grabbed a pinch of salt, a rare commodity  
to all but the most noble, and sprinkled it on his food.  
  
Finally becoming tired of the monologue, his Highness commented "I appreciate all you have  
done, it is quite good. I assume all is ready for the wedding?"  
  
"Oh, yes," Klink pronounced, "in fact, if you wish, my servant who is a tailor has the wedding  
dress in his hut, I can ask someone to take it up to the princess if you wish." He turned to  
Hoganmueller. "Hoganmueller, go to your hut and get..."  
  
"No," insisted Hochstetter, "send one of your knights, I will not have my bride, the King's  
daughter, look upon the likes of one of these commoners."  
  
"Very well. Schultz." He waited a second, then called louder "Schultz!" The fat knight came  
out of the kitchen with meat in his hand and several smears across the front of his suit of armor.   
Klink threw up his hands. "Oh, Schultz, you call yourself a knight?! Look at you! Now, wipe  
your armor off before you go get the princess's wedding dress, it must look spotless."  
  
"Jawohl, Sir Klink." He wiped his hands on Hoganmueller's topcoat, grabbed something with  
which to wipe off his frontpiece, and then walked over to the hut to fetch the wedding dress and  
take it up to the princess.  
  
Kinchmyer sighed as he considered the elegant lifestyle these people were leading. They  
thought nothing of peasants like himself. As the king sat chomping away in his elegant purple  
robe - still the hardest of colors to create and dye, even after thousands of years - he thought of  
the poor poeple living so close to the palace and wsting away from poverty and hunger. As he  
served the main course, though, he reminded himself that good would prevail someday, if not in  
this lifetime. That was very comforting at times like this.  
  
  
Ada sat in her room, and frowned. The wedding would be soon - very soon. All she could  
think of was Hoganmuller. She was startled when she heard a knock at the door. "Who is it?"  
  
"Sir Hans Schultz. I have brought your wedding dress."  
  
"You may come in." The door slowly opened, and Schultz stepped in, with the dress. Ada  
took the dress from the knight and smiled, as Schultz bowed, and left the tower. Her smile  
disappeared when she layed eyes on the dress. It was very beautiful, and nicely made. It would  
have been more beautiful, though, if she was marrying someone she actually loved.  
  
Slowly, and gently, she put the dress on her little bed, and stared out the window. "Rune,  
please hurry. There isn't much time left." As soon as she said those words, there was a knock on  
the door.  
  
"Princess Ada, may I come in?"  
  
"Yes." The door opened, and Kinchmeyer walked in.   
  
"I am Johan Kinchmeyer. I have come to take you away from the tower." Ada's eyes grew  
wide as she stood up from her chair.   
  
"I knew you wouldn't fail me after all!"  
  
"Rune always keeps his promises. Come. I will lead you away from this place." Ada nodded,  
and followed the servant out of the tower.  
  
  
  
"WHAT?!" The King stared at Newkirkheim with horror.  
  
"Princess Ada...she has been kidnapped!"   
  
The king's mouth flew open. "Servant, do you have any idea of who did this terrible crime?"  
  
"No, your highness, but I did see a man leading the Princess out in the woods. It should be  
easy to catch up with them. They were on foot."  
  
"Yes, yes. Perhaps you are right."  
  
"Your highness, would you like me to show you where I saw the man and the Princess?" The  
king nodded, and Newkirkheim led him out to the woods.  
  
Meanwhile, Gertrude saw a man ride by, wearing a blue robe, who was driving a carriage. He  
stopped. His face was covered up, but she knew who it was. "Hoganmuller, what are you doing?  
Why is your face covered up?"  
  
"I have come to take you to your wedding. I have brought the dress. You'll have to excuse my  
face. I had a bad accident riding here. So, it is cut badly." Gertrude nodded, and was soon in her  
dress, and was riding in the carriage. She was suspicious, though, when she realized that her  
brother had the exact same robe as Hoganmuller was wearing. Where did a servant get a thing  
such as that? She sighed, and decided it would be best just to keep her questions to herself.  
Hoganmuller was an odd servant, and he had his own way of doing and getting things.   
  
  
  
"Are you sure they were here, servant?"  
  
"Yes, your highness," said Newkirkheim, as he and King Fredrick were riding in the woods.   
They seemed to be going in circles.  
  
"Does anyone else know about this? Will the wedding be canceled until Ada has been found?"  
  
"Yes, your highness," lied the servant. He sighed. The King would probably catch on soon,  
and Kinchmeyer need more time to get the Princess away from the castle. He figured that they  
were on horse back, so it wouldn't take them long. Still, he didn't want to take any chances.  
  
  
  
Ada held on to Kinchmeyer as the two rode on Wizard through the woods. It soon began to  
rain, and Ada's dress had mud on it. "Where are we going?"  
  
"Rune and I picked out a special spot for you to hide. It will take us awhile to get there,  
because we want to be as far from Hochstetter as possible."  
  
"Good idea. Where are Rune and the others?"  
  
"They're at Burkhalter's palace. One is keeping your father away from there. Don't worry.   
They'll take care of things."  
  
"What about Prince Hochstetter? What if he should find out?"  
  
"Rune is a very clever man. He will think of something."  
  
  
  
Gertrude was on the verge of tears as she walked down the aisle, with Hoganmuller. She was  
so excited, she felt as though she were going to cry. The curse would be lifted, and she would be  
happy. She hardly paid any attention to the ceremony, and was startled when she felt her veil  
being lifted. She saw Hochstetter's face, filled with surprise.  
  
"Gerturde?!"  
  
"Prince Hochstetter?!"  
  
"How!? Why?! Who?! WHO?!" Hochstetter angrily turned to Hoganmuller, and yanked off  
the robe, to reveal the servant, in his ragged, worn clothing.  
  
"I thought you had an accident!" Getrude said.  
  
"So, Hoganmuller. You dare try to ruin my wedding. I will see to your death personally."  
  
Hoganmuller grinned, and said, "You'll have to catch me first!"   
  
As Hochstetter ran after Hoganmueller, Count Burkhalter screamed at Klink. "You  
dumbkopf, where was your security?"  
  
"Well, I..."  
  
"Yes," shouted Gertrude, "and how could you let me possibly marry that...that thing," came  
the exasperated woman as she pointed toward the spot where Hochstetter had stood seconds  
before. The shock had casued her to forget entirely about the curse.  
  
One of Prince Hochstetter's knights, clad in very dark armor, stood straight and glared at  
Gertrude. "Please do not refer to the Prince with that language and that tone!"  
  
Gertrude glowered at the knight. "I will talk in any manner I wish, my brother is among the  
King's closest advisors."  
  
Klink held up his hands trying to motion for them to quiet down as the knight proclaimed "my  
master has the King of Prussia's ear all to himself, he is his son, after all."  
  
"Your master is so savage, he probably has body parts from a lot of people," came the serpent  
tongued woman.  
  
"Uh," came the hesitant Sir Klink, "perhaps, since we have a little disagreement, it might be  
wise to just have the reception now and..."  
  
"NO!" shouted Burkhalter, his sister, and the prince's aides.  
  
  
  
It was lucky for Hogamueller's men that Klink's advice was not taken, as Carterheim and  
LeBeau were busily stashing as much food as they could into bags to be taken to several of  
Hoganmueller's secret hiding places. They assumed correctly that there would be a major row  
when it was discovered who was almost married to whom. And they were right. Carterheim  
unhitched the horse that Klink had ridden, and rode with the food toward the secret places. He  
was extremely thankful that Klink hadn't noticed Wizard missing. Must have figured Wizard was  
still sick, he thought to himself, recalling the excuse used yesterday.  
  
  
  
Hochstetter gritted his teeth, growling as he searched around for Hoganmueller. He 'd  
grabbed a sword from the armory inside the castle compound, and carried it with him. Instantly,  
he spotted LeBeau coming back from helping Carter out with the final sack of food. "You there,  
servant, what's your name?" he hollered, sounding ready to bite the man's head off.  
  
LeBeau nervously announced "Louis LeBeau."  
  
The prince was too upset to worry about whether or not he'd seen LeBeau before, much less  
where the princess might have gone. "Show me the kitchen," he ordered gruffly.  
  
The stout servant considered for a second whether to explain the smaller amount of food than  
normal to the man, then chose not to. Hochstetter looked too intent on something else, and  
besides, they had gone through a lot of it recently, with the feast earlier that day and now the  
banquet which was being prepared for after the wedding.  
  
Prince Hochstetter hastily dismissed LeBeau, then grabbed some wine which had been brought  
up fromt he cellar. He quickly poured a lethal dose of poison in the half-full bottle and mixed it  
up, carrying the bottle in one hand and the sword in another. If he didn't get Hoganmueller with  
the sword, he would pour him a drink and kill him with poison.  
  
He trudged up a back staircase of the main castle, then sat the wine bottle down in the  
emptied out 2nd floor dining area. Several of his men and Burkhalter's servants noticed him  
carrying the bottle, but assumed he was looking for the princess. The two groups had more  
important things on their minds. They had gone into the large room where the wedding was being  
held, and Prince Hochstetter thought he heard people throwing punches. Oh, well, there will be  
enough time later for brawling, I have more important things to tend to, he told himself.  
  
He thought he heard something above him. Suddenly, he sat the bottle down, walked out onto  
the porch overlooking the stables, and glanced up. There was Hoganmueller on the roof. "Ah  
ha," he cried as he scaled his way to the top, noticed that Hoganmueller also had a sword. "All  
right, now I've got you," he screamed, and soon began swirling his sword around, backing  
Hoganmueller to a point very near the edge. The servant glanced behind him and noticed he had  
about a foot more room before he stepped off.  
  
Hochstetter laughed as Hoganmuller stepped closer to the edge. Hochstetter's laughing  
stopped, though, when his hat flew off, and landed next to him, with an arrow pinning it to the  
roof. The angry Prince turned around, and saw Kinchmeyer standing a few yards away, with a  
bow in his hand. Hoganmuller took this opportunity to get away from the edge. Kinchmeyer   
tossed a sword, and Hoganmuller caught it. "Thanks, Johan!"   
  
"I promise you, Hoganmuller! Today, you will die! Then I will marry Ada, and no one will  
stop me!" As Hoganmuller blocked every one of Hochstetter's attempts to stab him, he wondered  
if Ada was safe. They had chosen a safe spot for her; the cottage where the orphans stayed. He  
began to focus on the sword fight once again, when Hochstetter nicked him with his sword.  
  
Just then, to Hoganmuller's horror, Hochstetter knocked his sword out of his hand, and it fell  
off of the roof, landing in the moat below them. The evil Prince laughed, and pinned Hoganmuller  
against a wall. He held his sword up to Hoganmuller's neck. "One good thrust, and it will be all  
over for you, Rune Hoganmuller." The servant felt the sharp sword rest against his neck. No. He  
couldn't it end this way. Hoganmuller grabbed Hochstetter's arm, and tried to pull it away. Then,  
he kicked him in the stomach, sending him down on the floor.   
  
Fortunately, Hochstetter's sword was on the floor, away from his reach. Hoganmuller picked it  
up, and held it right about his chest. "Remember, Prince Hochstetter of Prussia, this defeat. This  
humiliation. That I, a mere servant, has defeated you. The mighty Prince Hochstetter of Prussia.  
Be at peace, and leave Princess Ada be, or die." Just then, several guards ran up to the two,  
followed by Klink.  
  
"Arrest that man!" Hoganmuller was sure that Klink was pointing at him, but was surprised to  
see that it was Hochstetter that Klink was pointing at.   
  
"On what charge?" Hochstetter shouted.  
  
"For the murder of Count Burkhalter! Thank you, Hoganmuller, for catching Hochstetter."  
Hochstetter's eyes grew wide, as he glared at Hoganmuller.  
  
Hoganmueller wanted to inquire as to what Klink was talking about, but didn't dare - since  
Klink didn't suspect him, why bother? "That's right," was all he said.  
  
Luckily, the prince had plenty of queries. "What...what are you...how can this be," sputtered  
the man.  
  
"These men saw you carry that wine bottle up to the banquet table - that bottle which had  
poison in it!"  
  
"But I did not take it up to poison him, I took it to..." the prince began before stopping  
himself. He realized too late that he just admitted to taking it up to the room.  
  
"That's right, this man wanted to poison someone," shouted Hoganmueller, wondering who it  
was. Had it been meant for him? "And of course, a wicked man such as yourself would stoop to  
poisoning a Count, Prince Hochstetter. Unless..." Hoganmueller suddenly had a stroke of genius  
as he put a hand to his mouth and gasped. "You don't suppose..." He held his mouth open for a  
second, then hung his head. "I can't begin to think it. And yet I know this man is diabolical!"  
  
"Think what," came the clueless Klink.  
  
"Yes," proclaimed Hochstetter, "tell him, it was not meant for the Count at all."  
  
Hogan scrunched his eyes shut. "I'm afraid he's admitting it thought. It wasn't meant for the  
Count - it was meant for the King."  
  
"Ach du lieber..." gasped Sir Klink. "An attempt to kill the king!"  
  
Hochstetter began "that's right it..." then stopped suddenly. "WHAT?! How dare you imply  
such a thing, you...you..." He was totally speechless as Newkirkheim and the king climbed up to  
the castle roof.  
  
To Hoganmueller's questioning eyes, Newkirkheim said "I kept him away as long as I could."  
  
"What is the meaning of this," shouted the monarch as he stepped forward. "What does he  
mean, he kept me away?! And where is my daughter?!?!"  
  
Hoganmueller bowed and explained that "she is safe, we uncovered this man's diabolical plots  
before any harm could come to her. Or to you."  
  
"Any harm..." sputtered the king as he tried to make sense of the situation.  
  
"Yes," Sir Klink wanted to know, "what are you talking about?"  
  
"It's simple. We couldn't have His Royal Highness thinking that his daughter was in danger of  
being poisoned herself like Count Burkhalter was, he'd have come here in a flash."  
  
"What do you mean, the way Count Burkhalter was?"  
  
One of Klink's knights explained. "Your Highness, I beg forgiveness for having to report that  
Count Burkhalter was poisoned by some wine that Prince Hochstetter had poisoned and then  
taken to the banquet room." The king was aghast.  
  
Hochstetter tried to explain. "But it was for Hognamueller, I swear..."  
  
"A likely story," interrupted the servant. "That's why we had to sneak your daughter away to  
a safe place - we can't even tell you where yet becasue we want to make sure he had no help in  
planning this diabolical scheme. We made it so someone else was posing as your daughter for the  
wedding, and tried to unmask this villain." Hogan sighed, looking quite forlorn. "Sadly, we were  
not able to keep him from striking."  
  
The king sat down on the flat roof, dazed. "Well...at least my daughter...you are sure she is  
safe?"  
  
"Positive," spoke Kinchmeyer as Hochstetter was dragged away.  
  
The king ordered Hochstetter questioned quite vigorously to ensure there were no  
co-conspirators. "And to think I almost married my daughter to such a maniac. No political  
marriage is worth that." He buried his head in his hands. "Oh, but how do I explain to the King  
of Prussia what his son has done?"  
  
Hoganmueller grinned as he and his men were dismisessed by Sir Klink. "Simple. Just tell him  
you wish you could have done more, but he just left a bad taste in peoples' mouths." Before Klink  
could admonish the man for such humor, Hoganmueller had vanished, his men back to the castle  
and he riding toward the cottage where they had hidden the princess.  
  
  
  
Princess Ada sat behind the house, gazing at the tall trees. The sun shined down upon her, as  
her hair blew gently in the wind. She was startled to hear Rune Hoganmuller's voice. "Ada...glad  
you are safe." The Princess whirled around, and saw Hoganmuller standing mightily in the sun,  
with his sword.  
  
"Rune! You're back!" She ran up to greet the servant. "Is...Hochstetter out of the way?"  
  
"Yes, Ada. He is, but, Ada, now that Hochstetter is no longer a threat to you, it is time for us  
to say...good bye."  
  
"What? No, no, no! I pictured us together...running away from all of this. Together....you...  
and...I. Rune and Ada!"  
  
"I'm afraid that will never be, Ada. I am nothing but a mere servant. What do I have to offer to  
you, Princess Ada?"  
  
"I don't care about that, though."  
  
"Ada, you must go home to your father. Home, where you are supposed to be, the way you  
are supposed to be. Don't worry about me. Even if I could marry you, I would still have my  
friends to stay with. I have important things to do. I must help those who are in need." Ada  
looked into Hoganmuller's eyes.  
  
"It's such a shame, though...I really think you and I would have made a perfect couple." A tear  
rolled down her cheek.  
  
"I'm sorry, Ada. Maybe some other time, some other place. Just not now."  
  
"Can we at least go for a walk in the woods? Before I go back...please?" Hoganmuller slowly  
nodded, and the two walked away from the cottage, hand in hand. Soon, they stopped walking,  
and an ocarina fell out of Hoganmuller's pocket. Ada picked it up from the ground. "Is this  
yours?" Hoganmuller nodded, as Ada handed the terra-cotta instrument back to him. "Play  
something for me."  
  
Hoganmuller put the ovoid shaped instrument to his mouth and began to play softly. The  
beautiful music echoed through the woods. After a few minutes, Ada sighed. "Your music is  
beautiful."  
  
Hoganmuller stopped playing. "Thank you."   
  
"I guess I should be going."  
  
"Yes. I suppose you are right. Here...I want you to have this." Hoganmuller gave Ada his  
ocarina. "Take good care of this. Never forget me." Ada looked at the ocarina in her hand.  
  
"I will never forget...and thank you. Good bye, Rune. Until we meet again." Ada turned  
around, and ran back to the cottage, leaving Hoganmuller alone. He didn't see the Princess off to  
the castle. He just sat on a tree stump, and sighed. He would miss Ada.  
  
"Maybe...someday..."  
  
  
  
Schultz whispered the last part of the story, as both Janssen and Heinrich were now almost  
asleep, cuddled up against him. The bombing had completely stopped. "Hoganmueller and his  
men helped many, many people through their love and friendship, the way were are all supposed  
to care for one another. That is the moral of the story, we must always care for others, even if  
there are bad people in government like that prince who might say not to.  
  
"And one day the princess was able to find a wonderful man to marry, a man she wanted to  
marry and who she loved and who loved her. And they all lived happily ever after." He kissed  
each on the forehead, waited until he was sure they were asleep, then got up gingerly so as not to  
disturb them. The others whispered that they had really enjoyed the story.  
  
"That was wonderful, Father," spoke Oskar, "you have such a great imagination."  
  
"And the plot Hoganmueller made up," Erika began.  
  
Nodding, Wolfgang added "Ja, to think someone would think of something like that on the  
spur of the moment. I hope I have that good an imagination when I am a father."  
  
Schultz accepted the compliments, laughing to himself. If you only knew half the things that  
go on...  
  
  
  
Early the next day, just after the children had awakened, Hans Schultz prepared to drive back  
to Stalag 13. He and his family embraced, and he drove back along ravaged roads, some of  
which, after the Allied bombings, looked no better than a medieval trail through the woods.  
  
  
Reporting back to camp, he was startled for a second as he noticed Kommandant Klink  
wearing the old Prussian military helmet and looking into the mirror. "Hans Schultz reporting Sir  
Klink...I mean, Herr Kommandant."  
  
Klink removed the helmet and grinned. He must have really fooled Schultz - not that that  
wasn't easy. "Like it, Schultz? I always wondered what I would look like as a knight."  
  
Schultz agreed that it look good on him, and left. He chose to walk toward Barracks 2, where  
Hogan and his men were housed.  
  
"How was your time with the family," Kinch asked him, trying to stall the sentry.  
  
"Very nice," came the guard as he kept walking toward the barracks. Despite Kinch's best  
efforts to keep the fat man out, he opened the door as he explained that "there was a bombing run  
on our town while I was there, but I was able to comfort our children in the basement with a very  
nice story about..."  
  
As Schultz opened the door, his eyes grew as big as saucers. In front of him were two people  
embracing - Colonel Hogan and a beautiful young woman, with long, sandy blonde hair, and dark,  
brown eyes. Her long, blue dress was quite extravagant. "That...that is..." he muttered, pointing  
and gawking.  
  
The woman paid no attention - she was just glad to be away from the Gestapo. She sighed  
and said "I'm so thankful you rescued me from that evil Hochstetter."  
  
"Something wrong," Kinch wanted to know.  
  
"That...that...that is the woman from my story," came the incredulous sergeant. "But how?"   
He shook his head. "It cannot be...can it?"  
  
Using her code name, Hogan smiled sweetly and said "you'll be safe now, Princess, we'll get  
you safely out of Germany."  
  
Schultz's mouth flew open as he stuttered "it is the Princess...but it cannot be...that was only a  
story...and it was 500 years ago..." He began backing up slowly as Kinch gave him a wry grin.   
"How did she come out of....do not tell me...I want to know nothing, NOTHING!"  
  
He scampered away and ran to his post as fast as he could, glancing behind him and scrunching  
his eyes closed once and reopening them to ensure he was still in the 1940s, then uttered "how  
does he do that?" 


End file.
